# 27 **27**\ *I used to think that day was just a far off dream for me*\ *Dreading when I wake because I can't see past next week*\ *"What's the point of living if I'm just living a lie?"*\ *Those echoes in my memory are far away tonight* **27**\ *I used to think that I was all alone feeling this pain*\ *Using words and writing poems to keep up the pace*\ *Whisper reassurances to myself to feel safe*\ *Hugging pillows tightly as I'm drifting in this space* **27**\ *Now the railing that I'm safely behind keeps me sane*\ *I'm not quite the black rose that I pricked, but just the same*\ *I still can't see past next week, but maybe that's okay*\ *Maybe in this case my age was not an early grave* **27**\ *Now I use a new name and I wear a different face*\ *But I'm still the same girl even if I'm less afraid*\ *Back then I sat on sidelines to watch everyone else live*\ *And now, for once, it's my turn, I've got something new to give* **27**\ *I don't need to tell myself that I'm not worth living*\ *I don't need to hold onto my reassurances*\ *I don't need to feel like if I left no one would care*\ *I've made it this far and now I'm letting myself live* **27**\ *I'm doing my best and I know that's all I can do* \ *I know it's enough and I know you will see it, too*\ *This life is so precious and that's why, now, I can say* \ *I'm glad that I know that I'll be turning 28* *There's no big ending, no big rhyme to close off this chapter* \ *I'm not ending anything with a bang or a whimper* \ *Just acknowledging what I've now firmly put behind me* This is how it ends \ This is how it starts \ I deserve it.